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Absolutely, positively not
Book
2005
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Trade Reviews

  Booklist Review

Gr. 7-10. In a touching, sometime hilarious coming-out story, Steven DeNarski, 16, tries to deny he is gay. He covers his Superman posters with pictures of women in skimpy bikinis and lacy lingerie, and he follows the aversion therapy prescribed in a parents' handbook for getting over his deviant desires and awakening his sluggish interest in girls. He hangs out with the hockey players and tries to start dating (even kissing), to the delight of his fussy mom and macho dad. It doesn't work. When he reluctantly tells his friend Rachel that he is gay, he has to restrain her from celebrating it to the world and empowering him at school. The wry, first-person narrative is wonderful as it moves from personal angst to outright farce (Steven takes a pet golden retriever to the school dance). The characters are drawn with surprising depth, and Steven finds quiet support, as well as betrayal, in unexpected places. Many readers, gay and straight, will recognize Steven's need to talk to someone. --Hazel Rochman Copyright 2005 Booklist

  Kirkus Review

Sixteen-year-old Steven Denarski enjoys square dancing with his mother. He doesn't like sports. He's very neat. He's never had a girlfriend though his best friend is a girl. He's been meaning to toss that International Male Undergear catalog under his mattress for two years now, but he hasn't gotten around to it yet. Despite all that, he is absolutely positively not gay. He's sure of it, so he sets out to prove it to himself and the world. Taking instruction from an ancient text on male teen sexuality, he sits with the jocks--who ignore him. He goes out with every unattached girl in his class; he usually ends up cleaning her basement. After a disastrous date with a nympho exchange student, Steven can deny the truth no longer. He comes out to his overzealously accepting best friend and finds his troubles are just beginning. Gay teen angst has rarely been so funny. The characters might be a bit slight, and a few sit-com moments over-extended, but as a first effort on a touchy subject this will entertain readers no matter which team they play for. (Fiction 12+) Copyright ©Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
Summary
There is one thing Steven knows for sure: He's absolutely, positively NOT gay.<br> <br> Steven's a 16-year-old boy with two obsessions: sex and getting his driving license. The problem is, Steven's not thinking girls when he's thinking sex. Could he be -- don't say it -- gay? Steven sets out to get in touch with his inner he-man with Healthy Heterosexual Strategies such as "Start Hanging Out with the Guys," and "Begin Intensive Dating." But are Steven's tactics going to straighten him out, or leave him all twisted up?<br> <br> Absolutely hilarious. Positively sidesplitting. But absolutely, positively NOT GAY!
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